Oscar winners that everyone keeps forwarding to me is definitely nothing but a fake. It’s amazing that people still haven’t figured out not to believe everything they see on the internet. But for those of you who don’t believe it, E Online got the Academy to comment on it. They’ve confirmed that the document, which I’ve posted below, is “a complete fraud”. It would be impossible for such a list to have been leaked. This first started making the rounds on Wednesday or Thursday, before the winners had even been determined. Ballots were still being counted, no one knew the winners. I always feel bad that I don't get at least 90% of all my Oscar predictions correct. I have a degree in cinema studies! From a real college! All I do all day is watch movies and think about movies and write about movies! So when I come up with my measly 50% average, I just think it's all a cruel joke and that all my knowledge can't compare with the infinite wisdom of a coin flip.
But like Charlie Brown and a football, I'm back again, thinking I can predict the winners. I rarely account for upsets and tend to play it safe and whenever I think I know better, Oscar turns right around and kicks me in the face. So take these predictions with a grain of salt, be glad that it's too late to try and use them in your office Oscar pool, and come back later to see me humiliated once more.
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